Escaping Responsibility

Escaping Responsibility

In a world where everything changes so rapidly, something criticized one day can become a widely accepted idea the next. The influence of social media on individuals’ lifestyles reshapes their perspectives on life and their relationship with themselves every day through different interpretations. In these times, where many assumptions circulate (how to live correctly, five essential questions to understand oneself, love yourself first, toxic relationships, etc.), I came across Engin Geçtan’s book Being Human. Although I read it in one sitting, its impact stayed with me much longer. Through fourteen different themes, the book explores humanity’s ongoing effort to understand itself since the beginning of existence, while also highlighting how little we actually understand ourselves, guiding readers through an inner journey.

I would like to reflect together on a phrase directly quoted from the book: “one’s responsibility to live well for oneself.” Life has many dimensions, and in each of them, we take on different roles—work, education, family, social life… Within these, we experience moments of happiness, sadness, and boredom. Engin Geçtan points out that there are always people around us who give advice on how life should be lived. But how much say do we really have in living our own lives?

We are afraid of living our own lives. In pursuit of the “best” and “right” life, we avoid taking initiative, fail to enjoy what we have, and spend our time seeking approval while admiring others’ lives. As we fail to live the life we idealize, we blame our families and see ourselves as victims of negative experiences. With every responsibility we avoid, we gradually diminish and turn into unhappy individuals.

So how do we break this cycle? I’m not even sure if there is a universal answer. From Engin Geçtan’s perspective, stepping out of the comfort of the victim role comes with taking responsibility. Even though it may initially feel frightening and uncertain, a person can discover their more authentic identity through the responsibility of truly living their own life. Everyone has their own prescription, but before finding it, one must first become aware of and understand themselves, then create a personal roadmap. We do not have unlimited time for this. As Geçtan states, “Human beings consume time. And the time allocated to us is quite limited.” Therefore, we should live this limited time by taking responsibility for our own lives rather than seeking others’ approval. The responsibility to live well becomes possible only to the extent that we can hear our own inner voice.